i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
that's an acceptable place to lick
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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