you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I think people are normalizing furries
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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