just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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