real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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