i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
he fucked my hip out of place.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
