Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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