I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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