He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
