Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
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