put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
