I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
