Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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