well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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