How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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