Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Someone shattered a urinal.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
