If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
