last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
