After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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