let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
