haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
