i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
