thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
