i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
