Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
