just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
