She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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