i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize