I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
