Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
