she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I'm both gender and math confused
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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