Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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