i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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