Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
