i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
