You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
