I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize