haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
