I accidentally had phone sex last night
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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