Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
