its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Randomize
