your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
only if we run a train.
done.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
How drunk are you?
Completed.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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