Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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