Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
