the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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