Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
