somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Church boner. Awkwardddd
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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