The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
i drank out of a bidet.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Randomize
