Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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