watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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