You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
