Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
i out mim tonsoeep
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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